Learning to Love
by Kakashi's Missing Icha Book
Summary: what would happen if Hinata made the first move toward Naruto? lots of crazyness insues, even involving Kakashi's missing pants mainly NaruXHina other pairings not decided yet partial crack partial serious-ish fluffy fic *ITS ALIVE!*
1. preperations

Learning to love

(a naru hina humor/fluff fic)

Ch 1: Preparations

disclaimer!: warning i do not own Naruto, i do however own a pile of fanfics (suprisingly not all of it is smut, only a small bit) that is 10 ft high

A/n: almost everyone ends up being Ooc and everyone is as oblivious as Naruto, it starts a little while after the bridge incident, but to correct everything it takes place in December heheh my bad when i wrote this in September i didnt know when Hinata's birthday was

* * *

Hinata was about to pull her hair out. It was two days until the blue-haired, Hyuuga heir's 16th birthday when she planned to confess to Naruto, her plan was to use a kage-bunshin to take her place while she snuck away, after that she would (hopefully) meet Naruto at the top of the Hokage monument. But before all this she had to write the letter to get Naruto to go to the meeting place.

"Oh kami, what am I gonna do? If I can't even write a letter to him, how am I suppose to tell him how I feel?" Hinata thought aloud "I wonder if Tenten can help me? She and Neji have already confessed to each other, maybe she can give me some tips? , oh but what is she doesn't want to help me?"

"Help you? Sure I'll help you, heres some advice, close your window when you want to think aloud" came a voice from the window ledge

"T-Tenten!?! W-what are you doing here?"

"I was on my way to see Neji, but I heard you mention my name, so what do you need help with?" Tenten asked sitting down on Hinata's bed

"W-well I was trying to write a letter to someone but I can't bring myself to do it"

"oh I see.." Tenten looked over Hinata's shoulder to see a blank sheet of paper with a scribble on it

"why did you scribble out the name?" Tenten asked

"w-well you startled me when you came in…and I" Hinata stuttered

"oooh, so it's a secret crush, OK now I am definitely going to help you with this"

Hinata not sure to be happy or embarrassed just accepted the help….but unknown to her that certain blond she was thinking of was also lost in thought until another certain spikey haired blond came along and asked….

"have you seen a person with a very long sword and long silver hair"

"um…. Yea he said something about his mother"

"where did he go?"

"he went that way about an hour a…" was all Naruto could say before the mysterious blond ran off.

'what the hell was that all about?' He wondered 'oh well he's got an awesome sword, it huge!'

"hmmmm…. What to do?" Naruto wondered aloud

Since Naruto had seen Team 8 he couldn't get a certain blue haired person off his mind

"damn, Ero-sennin must be getting to me, what would Shikamaru say? Bothersome? No.. troublesome! That's it."

"what would be so troublesome that you would copy my line" said a almost stepped on Shikamaru

"woah!... shikamaru! What are you doing laying on the road?"

"take a good look around Naruto were on the roof"

"oh yea" Naruto said, wondering how he got on the roof

"so whats so troublesome Naruto?" Shikamaru seeing as he wouldn't fall asleep anytime soon and wondering what was so _troublesome_ that it was bothering Naruto

"oh its nothing"

"well something has to be bothering you, I mean nothing ever gets through that thick skull, I mean you don't even see that Hi…." Shikamaru stopped himself remembering what happened when he had been a temporary squad leader for Team 8 and Kiba brought up Hinata's crush on Naruto, and how many weeks Kiba spent in the I.C.U.

"see that what? Shikamaru?" Naruto asked innocently

"oh nothing, I got my facts mixed up is all" Shikamaru said lying through his teeth

"oh, ok hey wait a minute I'm not that thick" Naruto said feeling hurt

"so, um....Shikamaru if you wanted to tell someone something really important how would you do that?" Naruto nearly wispered having calmed down

Shikamaru thought for a minute...or two...or more -.-

"well i would just go and tell them, face to face" Shikamaru stated "anyother way would be too troublesome"

"hmmm.....i see" Naruto said with his mouth full of food

"gwaaah! where the hell did you get that bowl of ramen?" Shikamaru yelled crawling away

"well you took a while so i had a doppelganger go grab me some lunch" Naruto spoke happily "well i got to go do something see ya Shikamaru!"

"troublesome" Shikamaru mumbled going back to watch the clouds

-.- (i cant believe you Shikamaru) -.-

---at the Hyuuga Manor---

"so let me get this straight..." Tenten started "...your gonna deliver this letter, HOPE he reads it, and HOPE that he does what it says, then you will sneak out of your BRITHDAY party which also happens to be your 16TH, swap places with a shadow doppleganger, and meet him where you said"

Hinata hurriedly shook her head 'yes'

"girl you got guts! you sly girl"

Hinata blushed at the compliment

"well i guess i got to go and leave you to your dirty deeds, see ya, and i won't tell Neji so don't worry"

Hinata remembered that Neji had been training his byakugan to tell the difference between doppelgangers and the real person

"t-thanks Tenten" Hinata said, she would have to tell Neji about her plan, hopefully he would agree to help

and with that Tenten dissapered from the window

* * *

A/N all right the first chapter done dont worry i wont crap out on you by the second chappie i got like 7 or 8 chapters already done (just need to be typed) but they got room for improvements

ending monolouge: well what will happen next? will Naruto ever give up his obsession with ramen? will Neji help Hinata? will Kakashi ever find his pants!!! (wait thats not suppost to be there) and for the love of god what is Tenten's last name!?!?!?! who knows!?! tune in next time to Learning to Love for the only chapter that i cant think of a name for!!

AND REVIEW!! OR I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND HAVE MY TWO SCARRYEST FRIENDS CHASE YOU WITH A YAOI PATTLE AND A CROWBAR!!! MUHAHAHAH and dont forget i post update info on my profile


	2. the only chappie without a name

a/n: hello!! im back from the place i cannot name and i brang ch 2 with me hurray!!

anyway, i ment to have this up like a month ago, but i forgot one thing......i am l-a-z-y!! and it couldnt be helped oh well

and why do i have almost 300 hits and 2 reviews? i honestly thought better of you all, oh well i got a review and thats good enough for another chappie

and now onward!! (and when i said the bridge incident, i ment the one when sai was on team 7 as a replacment for sasuke sorry for the confusion)

"talking"

_'thinking'_

_'kyuubi'_

any face made of lines (ex -.-) yea, that is my 2 cents, so deal!

disclaimer: i do not own naruto, but i do own a bike with a jet engine on it (really, go to united nuclear . com, and look i own the older model, the one they dont sell anymore)

also the end of the chapter slightly lives up to the 'm' rating, so be warned

* * *

Chapter 2: the only one i couldnt think of a name for!!

Naruto had been sitting on top of the Hokage monument for a couple hours by now

"....."

_'hmmmm.....what should i have for lunch tomorrow?'_ Naruto thought

_' dont strain yourself, kit'_

_'oh, shut up stupid fox, i dont see you giving me any ideas....'_

Naruto had been staring at a map of the Hyuuga manor, that he had borrowed from Ero-sennin,(that he still had no idea or intention of finding out how he got it) trying to think of how to get into the Hyuuga manor...again....

_'if it go in through passsage number 7, and then go......'_

_'but then you pass by the kitchen and without a dought there will be some servants there'_

_'oh yea, wait why are you being so helpful now'_

_'because im board, so since you wont entertain me, then ill entertain myself, by annoying you hahahahahaha!!'_

_'oh joy' _Naruto thought sarcastically and went back to trying to find a way back into the Hyuuga Manor

soon Naruto was soo absorbed into planing that he didnt hear someone coming up the road, hell he didnt even know she was there until...

**BAM!!**

"OW, ALL RIGHT WH- oh its just you Sakura-chan, what are you doing up here?" Naruto asked sheepishly

"well i should be asking you that, you do know that even though theres no snow its still december? right?" Sakura said picking up the map and looking at it before handing it back to Naruto

"....."

"so what you doing all the way up here?" Sakura asked sitting down

"thinking.." Naruto mumbled still rubbing his sore head

"about what?"

"nothing in particular..."

"huh strange, i would of swore you would be pestering that pervert you call a sensi to teach you something"

_'pervert....hmmmm....'_ Naruto thought

"so i was wondering, since you arent doing anything would you want to go and get some ramen?"

"THATS IT!!" Naruto shouted, standing up and then running down the face of the monument, leaving a very stunned Sakura

_'what did i say?' _Sakura thought after the sudden out burst

* * *

*sigh*"i just wasted an entire day" Naruto thought aloud after realizing just how easy it would be to get into the Hyuuga manor

as Naruto went to open the door to his appartment, he saw a small lavender colored envelope taped to his door

_'huh, i never get mail, i wonder who its from?'_ Naruto thought grabbing it and entering his appartment

suddenly, Naruto's stomach growled

"i guess i should eat first"

* * *

--Meanwhile at the Hyuuga Manor--

*knock* *knock*

a loud rustling noise was heard from the room

"enter" a calm voice said "ah hello Hinata-sama"

"y-yes......um.......h-hello Neji-nee-chan" Hinata said losing all her confidence

"what may i help you with?"

"w-well it's y-your job to h-help me, correct?" Hinata finally mumbled out

"yes, i suppose, what is this about Hinata-sama?" Neji said in a very kind sounding voice(well for Neji, use your imagination!! allright??)

"w-well, there is something that i must d-do and i need your help to do it..."

"continue..." Neji said _'bad thoughts must....push....out of mind' _

"a-at the party, i have to l-leave and i will be s-switching with a kage-bunshin and..." Hinata got out before she was cut off

"and you need me to make sure you don't get caught, right?" Neji finished for her

Hinata only shook her head

"well, i will think about it, what ever it is if it makes you brave enough to do something like this, who am i to stop you?"

Neji turned around on the mat he was sitting on

"I shall inform you of my decision later..." Neji said flatly and waved her out of the room

Hinata bowed slightly and exited the room

after she left, Neji wipped out his copy of the newest icha icha paradise book

"heheh.........Tenten is awesome" Neji wispered under his breath

* * *

-.- _"wow neji's a perv, didnt see that coming?"_

* * *

--back at Naruto's appartment--

Naruto had eaten, read the letter, and was now pondering the obvious

_'what kind of ramen should i have tomorrow for lunch' _Naruto though

_'again, careful kit, you dont need to strain your self ' Kyuubi thought into Naruto's ear_

having lost his concentration, Naruto absent-mindedly farted

_'damn fox, shut the hell up!!' _Naruto thought angerly to the fox

_'so who do you think the mystery girl is, kit?' the Kyuubi thought to Naruto trying to change the subject_

_'hmmm....i dont know...' _Naruto leaned back in his chair _'hmmmm...atop the hokage monument at noon....'_

_'(insert fake sounding fart noise here)' _

and once again, Naruto lost his concentration, but this time he fell backwords

_'stupid fucking fox, quit making me think im farting!!' _Naruto thought quite loudly, obviously very pissed at the demon lord

_'hahahahaha i know who it is' the Kyuubi thought towards Naruto so suddenly changing the subject again_

_'no you don't' _Naruto thought back, completely forgeting about the chair and the fake fart

_'yes i do' Kyuubi simply thought back_

_'ok then who? oh great lord of the foxes and master of pissing and moaning' _Naruto thought with a chuckle

_'well it's soo obvious, the girl who sent you the letter is...wait i sense a disturbance in the force, hurry hide' the Kyuubi almost shouted at Naruto_

sensing the urgency in the foxes voice Naruto quickly asked "where?"

_'hurry out the window'_

over the years, if Naruto had learned anything at all, it was when the Kyuubi sounded scarred, you sure as hell better run, and just as Naruto jumped out the window......

the door came flying inward, snapping into two pieces!!!

Sakura jumped through the wall (even though she had just killed the door) and screeched like a banchee

"NARUTO!!! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!?!?!?!?" she bellowed, almost making Naruto wet himself, almost...

"WHEN I FIND YOU IM GOING TO BEAT YOU TO A PULP SO FAST, ORANGE JUICE WILL FEEL JELIOUS!!"

upon hearing someone threatening to beat Naruto up, as if he was running for his life, went to find the source oYEf the threat

Kiba jumped in through the window, completely missing Naruto, and landed in a summersalt and stood up right in frount of Sakura!!

"OH SHI-" was all he had time to say when...

"YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG" (insert cannon fire noise)

the next thing Kiba knew was he was being chased be a VERY pissed Tsunade with a GIANT rolled-up newspaper, while yelling at the top of her lungs about 'how good Ninja, who don't want to be casterated, don't piss in the Hokage's private garden, ESPECIALLY when she's working in it!!'

-back at Naruto's appartment-

so, finally not seeing Naruto, Sakura screamed again and stormed out, making another hole in the wall

"what the hell was that all about?" Naruto said after waiting a minute before coming out of hiding

_'maybe its her period' Kyuubi said with a shiver_

"no its not that....hmmmm"

_'maybe karma and Sakura are related?' Kyuubi thought quietly to himself_

"huh what did you say?"

_'i said it you write it up as Sakura's pms, you won't have to pay for the dammages, after all thats why they pay the 'pms tax' every month_

* * *

-.- _'wow Sakura and Tsunade's pms is soo bad the villagers pay a tax to cover the cost of the dammages'_

* * *

as Naruto's wondering about what was wrong with Sakura started to waiver, the thought simply jumped off the train and into the waiting volcano below, effectively killing the thought as Naruto's mind returned to the mystery girl from the letter

_'look kit, since i am trapped with you and your days are numbered, i will help you make the most of your time'_

_'y-you help m-me?!?!?! nani?!?!?!' _Naruto stuttered in disbelief

_'go to the meeting or else....' the Kyuubi simply said_

_'or else what?' _Naruto said questioningly

_'or else i'll your mind with images soo horrifying, that you may become like...' the Kyuubi trailled off_

_'become like who?'_ Naruto thought truly scarred

_'ANKO!!' the Kyuubi yelled ( que cheesy terror music)_

Naruto fell to his knees and yelled "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" then fainted, leaving the Kyuubi chuckling to himself

* * *

--Meanwhile at the Hyuuga Manor--

Hinata had been in her room _'enjoying herself'_(wink wink, nudge nudge), She had been _'reading'_ an early birthday present from Tenten, the NEWEST Icha Icha Paradise book!

that is...until a knock came from her door

and to say Hinata was startled was an understatement, she quickly took her hand out of her shirt, zipped her pants, and sat on the book (all while fixing her hair)

"c-come in" Hinata said still feeling flushed and embarassed at the stickyness of her nether-regions

* * *

-.-_ 'omfg she just had a fucking orgasm!! arent i wonderful?' -.-_

_

* * *

_

Neji walked in, saw the corner of the book, saw Hinata's flushed look, put two and two together...

"fish..." Neji mumbled and then announced "I have decided to help you, but on one condition..."

"w-what is the condition?" remembering Neji was a perv and feared the worst

Neji got a perverted look on his face

"you will lend me your copy of the new Icha Icha Paradise book, because Haishi took mine for himself" Neji said with a red tint to his cheeks

Hinata almost fell over, now if she had been Sakura or Ino she would of called him a pervert and then punched him through the wall, but she was Hinata, and she got mad when people tried to take her porn so she said:

"you can wait til i have finished it for myself"

"but..." Neji was caught off guard by her sudden confidence

"now go and read one of your other volumes" Hinata snapped back

"but.." Neji stamered

"Now!" Hinata almost yelled and Neji double timed it out of Hinata's room

and as soon as Neji had left, Hinata resumed her previous activity of _'reading'_

"heheheh Tenten is awesome!!" Hinata said reaching the same place as Neji did when he thought that

* * *

a/n well here it is the long awated chapter 2!! hurray!!

also i should have chappie 3 up tomorrow

anyway i would like everyone to meet my assistant "Rose Tiger", sadly Rose is not on at the moment i am writing this, So Rose will get an appearance next time....

monolouge time!!

What is Naruto's plan to get into the Hyuuga Manor? Will Neji ever finish the new Icha book? Will Kiba learn to not piss in the Hokage's garden? Who knew Hinata was so defenceive of her porn? What is really wrong with Sakura? Where the hell is Shikamaru? Will Kakashi ever find out when his pants go crazy? and what the hell is with Kyuubi and farting?!?!?  
Find out next time (hopefully) on Learning to Love, the only serious crack fic...

and Review!!! the more reviews i get the faster i write!!(2 reviews only took me about a month, so the more the merrier) and dont forget to check my profile for update info


	3. HOLY BEEP! A NEW CHAPTER!

a/n: well it certainly has been along time since I last updated, over a year in fact! Wow it feels like longer, and I would like to thank those who did review, I am hoping you will forgive the delay

and for those who didn't review, well I guess I wont release the hounds on you this time, but next time...hehehe there will be blood, THERE WILL BE BLOOD I TELL YOU **BLOOD!**

well I guess I have held you up for long enough, so without further ado here's Johnny! er... I mean the chapter...ugh...

"talking"

_'thinking'_

_'Kyuubi or other mental being'_

"**YELLING"**

I think you get the picture by now...

Disclaimer: I do not have the rights Naruto or any characters from the mind of Kishimoto-san, however I do have the right to remain silent, because anything I say can and will be used against me in the court of law.(damn cops...)

doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo

Ch 3: I fear for the future of Konoha...

*sigh* Naruto sat down "I'll never find him, I've been looking for hours!"

_'oh yes, all morning is definitely the whole of 7 minutes HAHAHAHAHA!' the fox mumbled from some corner of Naruto's mind_

_'OH SHUT UP, YOU...' _Naruto started back

"who are you looking for Naruto?" came a calm voice from behind Naruto

"HOLY ROTTEN RAMEN! SHINO! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM? NEVER MIND THAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU ALL MORNING!" NARUTO yelled so loud that his name was capitalized by mistake, and made Shino wince

"its only 6:20 am..." Shino spoke

"i know but I need to talk to you really bad, its about something that happened last night"

"alright, come lets walk and talk..."

-2 hours later-

"...and that's what happened" Naruto finished explaining his dream from the previous night to the normally stoic bug whisperer, who had stopped walking some time ago and just stood there in a state of shock(just use your imagination)

"Naruto..."

"yes?" Naruto nearly sang

"...you...have a serious problem, I suggest talking to a shrink, or maybe scheduling an appointment with Ino's father" Shino said with a shiver

"OK, thanks and please don't tell anyone okay?" Naruto begged

"believe me Naruto, when I say never, I mean I NEVER(its a Shino yell) want to even think about that ever again, let alone ever let that be uttered again..." Shino said with an sightly violent shiver while trying to get his composure back "...and on that other matter you asked about, I believe Hinata-san should be at home today, since Kunerai-sensi is away on assignment today"

"ok thanks again Shino!" Naruto said before sprinting off toward the Hyuuga manor

Shino then turned around and began walking home "I don't think I will be leaving the house for a while after this"

-a little while later at the Hyuuga manor-

Neji was just leaving for his usual late morning 'stroll'(or so he said), when he quite literally bumped into Naruto

"Hey Neji! There you are!" Naruto said offering his hand to help his friend up "is Hinata-chan here?"

"Hello as well Naruto, and yes she is here, but may I ask what business do you have with Hinata-sama?" Neji said while accepting the offer

"I just really need to see her" Naruto said slightly whining

"I apologize Naruto, but that's not good enough..." Neji said sounding stately "...you know as well as I that non-Hyuuga are not permitted within the manor grounds without either an escort or a appointment with Haishi-sama"

it was then that Naruto decided to put his plan into action

"say Neji, a little birdie tells me that your a BIG fan of the Icha Icha series" Naruto said smoothly

this had caught Neji off guard

"Preposterous, where did you get such an idea?" Neji said with a slight tinge on his cheeks

_'I GOT HIM! HEHEHE THIS IS SO AWESOME!'_ "well that's too bad, because you see, since Jariya-sensi just happens to be the author, I have a special LIMITED EDITION pre-release copy of the next volume signed by Jariya himself, which, may I add, will not be out for another 7 to 10 monthes" Naruto explained with the vigor of a starving salesman as he pulled the bribe out from inside his jacket and waved it back and forth in Neji's face

Neji was practically drooling at the sight of such book

"I-i see what you mean then, please follow me" Neji stuttered before turning around and walking back through the gate he had just exited

and after about 10 minutes of walking, Neji finally stopped at a random door and knocked. At first it was dead silent behind the door for a moment before the sound of clothing rustling and a large 'poof' was heard, before "c-come in Neji" a voice replied

"Please forgive the intrusion, Hinata-sama, but you have a guest"

"I-i see, please let them in" came Hinata's voice again, and Neji moved out of Naruto's way

Naruto turned and bowed to Neji and gave him the novel and then walked into the room

when Naruto walked into the room, Hinata's eyes grew big and her face turned as red as a cherry.

"i guess I'll take my leave now..." Neji said as he stood up and snickered to himself 'why not?' "...now remember Hinata-sama, you are expected to be a virgin until you marry" and then sprinted off down the hall waving his prize like a flag, Hinata got even redder...

_'I'm beginning to like that one heheheh' the fox thought to itself _

'OH DEAR! OH DEAR! OH DEAR!' Hinata was frantic 'WHY DID HE NEED TO SAY THAT?..._HE WILL HAVE TO BE __**PUNISHED**__ LATER_...no I have to calm down or else...'

'...huh, whats with everyone'(Naruto must be naturally clueless)

"N-Naruto-kun...w-what are you doing here?" Hinata finally broke the silence

"oh nothing, I just wanted to talk, you know catch up, I mean I've been away for two and a half years"

Hinata was on cloud nine, Naruto had come see her and just talk, it was too much for her...

_'HEY DON'T YOU FAINT NOW, THINK OF THIS AS PRACTICE FOR NEXT TIME!...oh...ok then...w-what do I say?...talk normal, like its Kiba or Shino...ok I'll try...'_

"hello? Hinata? Is anyone home?"

"ahh...ahhh...ano...ah...what did you want to talk about?"

Naruto froze _'ah crap, I was so busy thinking of a way to get in I forgot to think of something to talk about! any ideas fuzzbutt?' _

"_idiot...hahahahahaha"__in short the fox gave its usual help_

_'great load of help that is!'_

_'its more than you deserve...hahahahahahahahaha'_

"heheheh well actually I don't really have anything specific I want to talk about, I guess I'm kinda stupid that way..."

"y-your not stupid..." Hinata whispered

"Eh? What was that Hinata?"

"i.." "nope, a little louder"

"i sai..." "a little bit louder"

"I SAID YOUR NOT AN IDIOT!" Hinata yelled as loud as she dared

Naruto wasn't sure what was more shocking, the fact that Hinata had just told him he wasn't an idiot or the how loud she could yell

Hinata just let everything go and went with what her gut told her she had already done two things she thought she would never be able to do why not just go all the way?

"YOUR SMART, KIND, QUICK WITTED, YOU NEVER GIVE UP, AND DESPITE HOW HORRIBLE YOU WERE TREATED AS A CHILD YOU STILL TURNED OUT TO BE AN AMAZING PERSON!"

"h-hinata...i think you should..."

"YOUR EVERYTHING I WANT TO BE AN...mmm!"

Naruto had caught her in a kiss

"there finally! You shouldn't yell, it doesn't suit you, and with the walls here being so thin...huh Hinata? Hinata!"

"NARUTO! HURRY AND RUN HAISHI-SAMA IS COMING AND HE IS'NT VERY HAPPY!" Neji yelled from down the hall

_'oh crap!' _Naruto thought and dashed out the window just as Haishi ran into the room

"ALL RIGHT WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?" he yelled, but Naruto was already gone _'damn, hes gone, maybe I shouldn't of ran in here like that...all I wanted was a copy for myself'_

**A/N: aaaaand cut! There you have it folks, the long awaited chapter 3 of Learning to Love. I'm soo sorry it took me 2 years to update but well...I kind of gave up when I lost my manuscript when I moved, and then I promised that there would be a 10 chapter update when I finally did update again and well I'm really bad at keeping my promises(sorry) but alas I digress.**

**Ending monologue time: WHY did Haishi break into Hinata's room? Will Hinata ever confess to Naruto? Will Kakashi ever find out what the fuck is wrong with his pants? WILL I EVER UPDATE AGAIN? who knows, so tune in next time on Learning to Love, the story that is finally continuing!**


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